Mommy Meetup Etiquette

mean moms at mommy meetups
Mommy meetups are nothing more than a social experiment that can either go terribly right or terribly wrong. Meetups are a great way to socialize with other moms, and introduce your child to new playmates. They are always started with best of intentions; just a mom wanting to meet and offer support to other moms in her community. But unfortunately, there is always that one mom that comes and fucks everything up. She is the “Mean Girl” or the “Mean Mom,” or she just doesn’t care about anyone else’s experience within the group. She’s more interested in climbing the social ladder and creating dysfunction than finding new playmates for her kid.

Don’t be that mom! It is never a good idea to put-off moms in your community. You could avoid this by simply observing some simple mommy meetup etiquette rules.

Don’t Be Tardy for the Party!

Timeliness is next to Godliness, or maybe that’s cleanliness. Anyway, being on time is greatly appreciated. This is especially true for mommy meetups in places where the group will move around such as the zoo or a stroller stride. Or, if there is food involved! No one wants to wait or look for you.

Dress for the Occasion

Everyone likes to make a good first impression. But it is more important to be yourself and appropriate. Don’t show up for a zoo stroll in red bottoms, heels are obviously not the best for a long day of giraffe stalking. Overdressing could also leave the impression that you’re pretentious and show-y.

Show a Genuine Interest in the Moms

Now is not the time to be exclusive. Don’t just encircle one mom like a shark and exclude everyone else, or kiss the ass of the organizer. Take the time to talk to every mom and show genuine interest in each.

Sharing is Caring!

All moms will bring food and drink for their child, but if you bring enough for everyone you’ll be greatly appreciated. I don’t know how many times my child has looked over and wanted someone else’s snack instead of the one I prepared. Sharing is caring! But don’t be presumptuous and just hand someone’s child food. Ask mom if they can have it first; kids these days have all sorts of allergies and special diets.

Don’t Brag About Your Child

There is nothing wrong with sharing your child’s accomplishments with the other moms, but don’t brag. This just annoys other moms, and sparks unnecessary competitiveness and jealousy. Also when you’re busy bragging about Lil’ Timmy, you leave no conversational room for adult topics. Remember, the mommy meetup is for adults too! We want to talk about grown-up things as well as kiddie-related material.

Compliment Other Kids

There is something special about every child, and if you can spot those special traits in other kids their moms will love you. Every mom likes to hear positive things about their child. This tactic is also a great way to get in good with the other moms.

Teach Your Child Manners

Remind your kids that they are not at home. Don’t allow them to go just open someone else’s fridge or be presumptuous in any way. We understand that they are just kids, but the more well-mannered they are the better you look 😉

Keep Aggressive Kids Home

No mom wants to look up and see your child assaulting theirs. If your child has a history of aggressive behavior, socializing them will probably help but unfortunately no mom wants their child to be the test dummy. Unfortunately, if your child is not well behaved, it is best not to bring him to the play dates.

Don’t Be the Messy Mom

If you’re a Messy Molly, your first mommy meetup is not the time to start gossiping about one mom to another. Since you’re new, it’s best to kick back and observe the social order, and get a feel for how the other moms interact.

Offer to Help the Organizer

There is often one mom that organizes everything, and if the group is really active the task can be overwhelming. Offer to help the organizer, or organize an event.

No Controversy Please!

Leave your political views or controversial topics out of the conversation when you’re new to the group. Some moms have very stoic views and take great offense to anyone who believes different. Take your time getting to know the moms before you accidentally offend them with a political rant.


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Brandy - The Mother

Hi, I am Brandy and I am "the mother." I enjoy being a mother, friend, and playmate to my son.

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5 Responses

  1. August 31, 2014

    […] There are over a dozen exciting Mommy Meetups in the San Francisco Bay Area this week. If you’re new to Mommy Meetups, check out our Mommy Meetup Etiquette Guide. […]

  2. September 7, 2014

    […] There are over a dozen exciting Mommy Meetups in the San Francisco Bay Area this week. If you’re new to Mommy Meetups, check out our Mommy Meetup Etiquette Guide. […]

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    […] Mommy Meetup Etiquette […]

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    […] There are over a dozen exciting Mommy Meetups in the San Francisco Bay Area this week including Community Beach Clean-up in Alameda and Mommy and Me Dancing in Richmond. If you’re new to Mommy Meetups, check out our Mommy Meetup Etiquette Guide. […]

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